Chivalry is still breathing and let’s leave it to breathe!

Some people say chivalry is dead and some say it's old-fashioned now but I would like to explore a deeper meaning of the word here. I know many women of my age and those older who say that all men are the same and no gentlemen really exist in our generation, but I would like to differ here.

I've met men who opened doors for me, offered an elbow to walk along, hosted a suitcase in a plane’s overhead compartment or waited for me to enter the lift, or pulled the chair, or paid the bill on our first meeting. I’m not offended when a man offers to carry a heavy shopping bag or recommend walking on the outside of the sidewalk when escorting me down the street. I have come out feeling nice about the experience and the person. I am a lady and would like to be treated like one. And if a man is man enough to do that, I am impressed.

Once I went for an adventure trip with my friends, where while climbing up, at one moment, I almost slipped through a rock. A friend of mine extended his hand to help but I told him to let me try by my own. He backed off and waited for me to join him at the top. I managed it by my own. Of course it’s an adventure trip so in a similar situation I don’t want a man to do the helping a damsel in distress thing for me. I can handle that. But in a social environment, if a man offers to get me a chair or a drink, I find it courteous. I don’t expect a man to do all this but if he does it for any woman, young or old, I would be delighted by the gesture.  Though it’s important to do it naturally, without just trying to make an impression.

I wonder why few feminists make it a frowned gesture by giving it name of gender bias. I feel it’s perfectly fine if some one shows they care.  Holding a door open for a woman is one of the basic chivalrous acts. That doesn’t mean a woman is incapable of opening the door herself. It just means that you are showing common courtesy and respect. I don’t believe their politeness stemmed from the belief women were less. Why should we equate simple courtesy with gender roles? I feel that everyone, male or female, should be willing to assist those who need it, and should also be appreciative of any assistance given.

If a man rings me at home at night it could be because he wants to ensure I reached safely. It’s fine if some one lends a coat to any body struggling with a sleeve. There is no reason for a war of the genders here. Women inclined towards feminist tendencies should understand that there is not always a hidden motive behind this gesture to let you down. Remember you are not so weak that a man can establish your dependence by simply opening a door for you.  Receive such gestures politely with gratitude.

I dislike women who pretend to be delicate darlings all the time and pretend to walk all brittle when draped in a sari and expect a man to hold their purse or mobile. Please don’t try to be like a lady; if you are not. Just be yourself, be whoever but don’t fake being feminine just to extract chivalry from a gentleman and be treated like a VIP at his expense.

Chivalry is simple courtesy. And it should work out both ways: If a man holds the door open for you, you must say ‘thank you’ in return. Such behavior and good manners are expected in BOTH the genders. It’s not a concept that should be limited to the things men do for women or vice versa but extended to include things that people do for ‘others’.

Generally people ask questions – Is chivalry dead? I say No it’s not dead but it is to a point endangered. To the men who still practice it without being tacky, I salute. To those who don’t, get off your lazy ass, put the video game controller down and help your lady open that jar. There is nothing wrong with being chivalrous to a woman you love or are courting.

We should all be kind to each other whenever we can. I would rather risk offending someone than risk leaving them to struggle when they could have used a hand.

So guys! Go get chivalrous to all women not just the pretty ones ;-) and all the ladies out there learn to appreciate the little gestures that make you feel so special :-)

Click me a picture!

It was a day off from work today. It was just a perfect interlude to spend quality time with myself, perfect time to give an ear to my own voice and spend a day in my own band. I was searching for some stuff in my cupboard and suddenly my hands caught one of my most precious chattels – My old albums. I had enough of them to cover my bedroom floor.

People speculate what is the thing with captured images that allures me, but most of the time I fail to make them understand. For me, pictures are my way of preserving the most beautiful moments of my existence on this planet. Ma told me since childhood, I was very fond of getting myself clicked. My face lits up with a big flashing grin every time I sensed a camera around me. She has pictures of me making silly faces, flaunting my new dress, kissing my lovely dolls and posing every time as if I am the next super model or miss universe. Lol I opened my album and took a slow stroll down the memory lane.

Love, Joy, excitement, smiles, a little sorrow there is so much captured in an image. As I looked at each one of them, a whole string of memories followed. At one moment, I am smiling and the next, I have a silent tear rolling down my cheek. I think about the way these years have groomed my life. I am amazed to see how I have grown and evolved. As I smile and flip through the pages of the album, I feel like I have gotten into a time machine and I'm going through my life all over again. Few pictures bring back the memories of people who were once a key part of my life but now it feels as if some one has torn off a page out of my life’s diary. It appears as if that chapter never existed. But before I have time to ponder much about it, I'm distracted by watching myself laugh, enjoy and love unconditionally. Smiling and going through the various emotions I finally landed at the current juncture of this journey - My present.

As I sit here with a zillion thoughts running through my mind and infinite memories flowing in my heart like waves at high tide, I realize something I knew always. Everything that I went through, the fun, joy, laughter, sorrow, unconditional love and everything else is what has brought me to where I am today. All I know is, where I am right now is where exactly I am supposed to be. My little world is absolutely beautiful and I wouldn't have it any other way. While flipping through the pages of my life, the major observation I made is that, the best pictures happened when I was with people who I loved. This is a reason why I love photographs. They tell stories of people I love and bring back the memories of happy times to have me revive them again and again :)

Happy Birthday to me :)

    

So it was my birthday last week. I had an awesome day. And No, I am not telling how old I turned. Quite a girlie thing ;-)

20th Jan! This day has always been special to me not only because it’s my birthday but also because I share my birthday with a special love of my life – My Dad! We were born on same date and same day, different years though. lol. Interesting na! It’s been years that we have been celebrating our special day together and every time my amazing parents have been great in making it feel like the world has stopped turning – in a good way – in my honor.

Birthdays always makes me feel like a celebrity. Why? Because my phone is ringing every five seconds with people texting and/or calling, writing on my face book wall, sending me birthday mails or sending messages on twitter or LinkedIn. I do feel loved and blessed. Much Gratitude!

Now coming back to the D day …  I am glad that on that day I decided to skip office. (ahh, the luxury of making your own schedule...) I believe it's a big deal to have this one day out of 365 that is completely dedicated to your being - a day on which you do all that you want and the way you want ;-)

Like every year my darling mom - dad woke me up with their warm hug and countless blessings. I am grateful to them for the love and support they've given me all my life. And most of all, I'm grateful to God for giving me the grace to celebrate another birthday so I began my day by going to Bangla Sahib Gurudwara with mom to get the blessings of babaji J Can’t forget to mention here, I had a beautiful bouquet of flowers and chocolates delivered at my home in morning. It’s been almost a week and I am still clueless who sent it. So my dear well wisher if you are reading this blog please let me know your name so that I can at least thank you for the lovely gesture J

In afternoon, I visited a beautiful place called “Kingdom of dreams”. I think it will be difficult for me to describe it in words how wonderful the place was. I actually felt like a princess in this beautiful imitated kingdom. To add to its charm my friend gifted me a crown and actually made me Princess for a day. We ate, talked, laughed, and of course, took pictures ;-) I am thankful for the laughs we shared, the bonds we made, the memories we created, and of course, the gifts I received. Hehehe.

We also watched the night show of a stagecraft musical dance performance called “Zangoora” in a world class theater - Nautanki Mahal. The whole set was animated and was designed by Wizcraft. It was no less than a wonderland and I was deeply involved in this magic world with the people I love. They spoiled me beyond reason that day by pampering me and fulfilling each and every wish of mine. I am grateful to god almighty that he has given me many reasons to smile and appreciate this beautiful gift we all call Life.

Because certain relationships need no “TAGS"

Just for a minute, close your eyes and think of all the people who mean a lot to you… May be the images that flashes to your mind is your family, some one you love, few favorite relatives, few people who were once major part of your world or few close friends with whom you share a very special bond… I believe these are few handful of people we tag as “important”  J 

In this post of mine, I will not talk about these important people, because we already know their worth. These are the people who occupy a major share of thoughts in our mind… To an extent these are the people who hold the power to make us happy or to leave us crying…

But here I talk about the unnoticed, overlooked, unacknowledged, in fact not so important relations, The ones we hardly chose for ourselves… They do not hold any special place in your lives and their absence may not even be noticed, yet their presence makes you at ease. These are the people who don’t expect anything from you, yet unexpectedly make you happy,

I am sure most of you don’t get what I am saying, and have already termed me as insane!!

Umm let me try once again, Do you have any smile friends? Few people with whom you hardly ever talk to, yet whenever you meet them, be it what ever mood you are in, you exchange smiles?

It could be a little girl who waves her hand to you whenever you enter the community park… Or any face book friend whose updates motivates you for life whenever you are down, or any fruit vendor who suggests you to take apples instead of grapes because he believes they are better Or even an attendant of a restaurant who hardly even knows your name, but knows the table you would love to occupy and reserves it for you whenever he sees you walking in  J 

Or it could be even an old colleague whom you are meeting after a long time and he asks your whereabouts! His life of course is not affected by you but still he is concerned. Or an acquaintance, with whom you hardly ever interact comes up to u and asks if you are fine because he has been noticing your missing smile, broken arm or something of that sorts… These people are hardly your friends but they are important. For they give us the happiness which mostly goes unnoticed.

Just for one day, think beyond the important people in your life and concentrate on these people who touch your lives in a special way, spare, even if it’s a minute out of their own busy lives and make you smile!!

You will find loads of such people, acknowledge them!! And look at the smiles you get from them!! Suddenly your handful of important people list will increase drastically!!

I did so today and I am feeling content from deep within. I smiled little more today, appreciated my beautiful life more, shared few hugs today and realized that to make a difference to some one’s life you don’t need a relationship name tag, may be all you need is a little kindness and a will to spread smiles J

Welcoming New Year in Aladdin’s castle: Jaisalmer!

Most of us spend our life as if we have another one reserved in the bank -- Ben Irwin.

I can relate to this as I know I don't have a reserve and I intend to leave no regrets in life and live this one dedicating it to my heart's desire J

Another year went by so quickly like speed of light. I began this year with many promises to myself including a positive outlook, my personal growth, wonderful memories, new achievements, a doze of maturity and lots of travel. Writing about how the past 365 days changed my life is definitely no easy task. People came and went, I cried, laughed, loved, cared, envied, desired, bitched, and above all discovered myself further.

2011 certainly hailed as super lucky to me. I began to blog, got deal of the year award, did bungee jump, participated in a car rally, got promoted, few dance shows and above all traveled a lot including one international trip. There could not have been a better way to end this wonderful year by adding one more chapter to my travel diaries and I chose to visit what people often call as Aladdin’s castle – Jaisalmer!

Traveling is exhilarating for me and the thrill of exploring things anew keeps the traveler in me tickling. I was excited to the core as I was about to spend this long awaited vacation with the people close to my heart. As soon as we arrived at the hotel we straight away went to the terrace. The views were unbelievable and the roof top was lovely overlooking an amazing red fort.  It was lovely!

The attraction in Jaisalmer is a beautiful fort that looks like it is has been carved out like a sand castle on a hill. Inside is a living city where about 1500 people reside. The fort is the oldest occupied fort in the world and it was amazing walking though the tiny alleys. It was really something else wandering the streets.  It really did feel like a scene from Aladdin and I portrayed like no less than princess Jasmine ;-)

After climbing a huge set of stairs and we came to roof top and I was amazed with the 360 view all around. That’s Jaisalmer for us - a wonder view. The architecture was incredible and the whole atmosphere out of this world.

But the most exciting part of the trip was still to be witnessed. Our trip to the golden sands of Thar Desert and to spend whole night there without a tent just below the open sky watching twinkling stars! Yes! You heard it right on the sand in the chilly December night J We hopped into the jeep. On our way we spent about half an hour in a ruined place which locals consider to be haunted [mostly getting ourselves clicked and just hoping if we could spot a ghost and the narrate story to our friends :P] lol

  

As the sun set it appeared God has painted a wonderful painting on the desert canvas.

We reached our destination for the night; a beautiful expanse of rolling sand dunes with not another soul to be seen. It’s mere 150km from the India/Pakistan border, and so has a strong military presence. As we took our seats around the fireplace in the star lit night sky, my friend started to play guitar and we all started singing sufi songs.  Post our musical performance; it was time to treat ourselves on conventional Rajasthani cuisine. We made delicious “lal maas” in the desert. Rajasthan's traditional food is a national treasure, undoubtedly. After dinner, we all slept in the cold sand below beautiful sky in that cold night and made it a night to remember through out our lives …. Yes, this memory will stay with me for many years to come. I spent the wonderful night with equally cordial people discovering the enticing vast desert. Locals in Jaisalmer told me not to miss the sunrise, as it was one of the most beautiful moments of the day and I was fortunate enough to see it early morning as I woke up. I took some beautiful shots of the sunrise in the desert. I was surprised by the nature’s wonder J

As all good things come to an end so did this magical night and we headed for our hotel. I can’t forget to mention that sitting on the roof top terrace of “Little Italy” restaurant overlooking the fort, with golden lights in the night and spending many lazy hours discussing the beauty of life with my dear ones was one of the marvelous moment of my life. The next few days were spent relaxing and enjoying the delicious local food (not to forget onion kachoris and bhel) and soaking up the sun.

What a wonderful start of the year it was! And soon came the time to pack our bags and return to Delhi. Jaisalmer is a dream come true for any traveler and I was also mesmerized by its beauty. The charm and the beauty of the city are awesomely alluring and I would love to visit this golden city with my dear ones again for sure.

Bagwati - A new adornment to my closet!

I finally realized that there is no Santa. After years of keeping those lists under my pillow and waiting endlessly for some old man from the sky to come and drop in an awesome gift or two, my wait has officially come to an end. I know I took a little more time than all you grown ups. :P Okay, So I take it upon myself to be my Santa, to quench my desires for those gifts. And well, during one of my recent quests to get hold of something good in a mall, I saw this Bag.

Well, to be honest, I do not shop, I normally go on a quest. A mission rather to get hold of something awesome…. frisking unknown things, visiting an infinite number of shops, sometimes even talking to those inanimate objects to let them excite me.. and then, you guys think that we girls take a lot of time to shop! Come on, it is more of a religion to us..

So, yes, coming back to the topic. I see this awesome bag sitting beautifully in the window of this showroom. One look and I knew that’s exactly what I wanted. I mean, in spite of the price tag attached to it. Hmm, yeah it costed a bit, Rs 8500 to be exact, but then, as they say all good things come for a price.. well, most of them certainly do.. sadly! So, here was my Bagwati. Staring me right into my eyes, like some prince charming to get her.

Introducing Ms. Bagwati : An extremely welcome addition to my collection. Yes, sweet heart you adorn my closet quite well. And I'm absolutely lovin' this. It has space for everything that goes into a woman's bag.. My heart-shaped mirror, hair-brushes, mascara.. and the rest. Ah, well guys stop right there. You're not supposed to know what goes into a woman's bag!  J 

So, Ms. Bagwati finally ends my quest for a perfect bag officially, Until it starts again….. :P

One for the man of my dreams…

Driving down on a foggy morning with my car’s music player on repeat mode at just one song “you are beautiful” by James Blunt, made me feel heavenly and put this soft smile on my face today. It’s not that there was something special today but some how I smiled every time he repeated “You are beautiful, It’s true” ' It may be for the way he hums these words is a lot more than just a compliment to a girl J  

I know I am one of those hopeless romantics at heart who believe in concepts like “Happy ever after”, “made for each other” and “soul mates”. Who gets touched with most of these love stories no matter how clichéd they are, who live for the feeling of possibility and hope, who know that love does not exist only in books….

As a little girl I always dreamt of fun, spontaneous and wonderful surprises that love will bring in my life. In my early teens, I was fascinated to imagine that when I will fall in love my life will become more beautiful, every day more colorful, every morning more bright. It’s like when you feel like any other protagonist in Yash Raj films. You will wake up happy every morning, people will suddenly start smiling at you, music will play in the back ground, you will look yourself into mirror some twenty times a day, the wind will make your hair blow in the right directions, and it will rain only so that you can look supremely gorgeous. Every thing will be just PERFECT. We all have thought like this at some point in our life. Haven’t we? :) Perhaps that’s what we call innocent growing up days. But then, as years passed, I realized that it’s not this music in back ground, wind or rain that makes it perfect it’s just HIM

We all have to accept the fact that life is not like a typical bollywood movie where you come across him at an epic moment, with some soft music playing at the back drop and you know that he is the one! Yet, deep down I strongly feel that when that person is around, you know that he is the one with whom you really want to spend the rest of your life with and your heart says, “Yes he is the one, go grab him girl!” :)

I know….. I know for a fact many things…..

No one secretly leaves flowers at your doorstep each day.

Agreed! But he may just know my favourite flowers and gets them for me. 

No one surprises us daily

Agreed! But one day he may just suddenly drop in to my office to make sure if I am fine

No one tells you every day that how much they love you,

Agreed! It might be at least expected moment when he says, I LOVE YOU.... and I turn speechless

Falling in love is certainly beautiful. Something that heightens the wonderful experience that is life. Some day, I want to get married looking at my best to someone who cannot believe how unbelievably gorgeous I am [ok now even if I am stretching it a bit, but it's my wedding day ;-) ]. Lol

And now till that day comes I write this blog for this future guy so that one day when he will read all this he will just know how long I have been waiting for him to come along :)